You are definitely not whining Ang, and even if you would feel like doing so, well, this is your speakers corner - at least one of them - and this is where you can share anything you feel comfortable to share, from the smallest snippet of information to the most elaborate ideas, from heartfelt rantings to excellent and shrewd observations, of which you have made many.

All of these writings I can never separate from the bigger picture that I have of you, which consists of memories that date back to the first incarnation of the CA forum, well before the first Spider-Man movie was ever released. I still think back on these days with a smile on my face. I remember the fun.

It was because of you I first set foot on Xanga. At the time I didn't know the first thing about blogging, while nowadays hardly anyone seems to be without a blog of any kind, even the most minimal one. And through Xanga, I have met some wonderful people whose existence I would never have been aware of, if it wasn't for Xanga, and if it wasn't for you.

So is this bigger picture a positive one? I'll say. The core thereof is virtually indestructable and serves to place anything you say or do not say in the proper context of the kind and incredibly clever person I know you to be (in all fairness, you do outsmart me!). So even if you were to say something that would be completely out of character, that bigger picture would remain intact. You are after all still you, and personally, I wouldn't want it to be any other way .

It is the self-editing that takes the fun out of blogging. I started doing it myself at some point, like you, in anticipation of who might be reading. Even know I still don't know if this place is more like a diary of sorts, where I can simply write away, or like a place where I address a small audience of friends, aquaintances and the occasional passers-by, who might even become friends later on.

Being here in Xanga-land is like still hanging around at a party where the music stopped playing ages ago. Some of the people that used to be there, have long gone to other places. The circle of people still present here has grown smaller and I am one of them. My life has changed, as have the circumstances under which I live my life. I like where it is going. Most of the contacts I have, are outside the internet these days. There is no more time for MSN and I find myself falling short of maintaining contacts through e-mail.

I don't know if that is bad or not, but I know this: if Xanga would be as it was before, I would hurry back here, because this is one party I wouldn't want to miss.

Love,
Aart